In my decades of working with people in their journey of realising their desires, goals and life ambitions, I realise that many people get confused about what to do with their emotions.
Some gurus say, not to feel upset when things go wrong in life. And some others ask us to ignore our negative emotions and they’d go away.
What I’ve learnt, is that you can’t really help feeling the way you feel when something doesn’t quite go your way. And, it’s not wrong to feel.
So then, how do emotions and feelings play a part in our development and in the journey of self mastery?
I’ve learnt that more than the type of emotions, what matters is the amount of emotional intensity and the duration of intensity we place on any experience we are dealt with.
Let’s say we witness a nasty car accident on our way to work. Here are the potential outcomes of how you would feel or emotionally respond to this experience.
- Not have any emotions or thoughts and just drive away
- Express shock at what you see, and repeatedly reintroduce this shock to your body, mind and energy by telling as many people as you can at work and at home, what you saw earlier in the morning
- Express shock or pity at the moment, and as quickly as you can, gently move your focus away from the intense feeling.
Ideally, the third option would be the way to go, because we’re not lingering too long in a state of shock or pity, which are naturally not the best states to be in for manifestation.
The trick with emotional regulation is, that it’s important for us to detach from being too emotionally involved with an experience. A study done by the NYTimes found that some people are just naturally more emotionally-intense, which others are less emotionally-intense. The study highlights the case of an emotionally-intense woman who became depressed over losing a pen. And also of a less emotionally-intense man who was barely excited when told that he was rid of an illness that he struggled with for a long time.
So where’s the benchmark? The answer is – there is none.
We are not aiming to be more or less emotionally-intense as compared to someone else. It’s is not at all a competition. Rather, having a better understanding of our emotional intensity levels can help us improve our manifestation energy.
So the aim is not for us to have less emotional intensity all the time, because emotional intensity is important in the process of visualising or manifesting your desires, goals and ambitions.
When you have a desire, you are actually, able to realise it. When you feel that something is not working in your life currently, you have the ability to change it. This is the power of you. Successful athletes know this too. Boxing legend Muhammad Ali loved sharing how he saw himself victorious before a fight. In the words of W.Clement Stone, whatever the mind can conceive, it can achieve, right?
And this is where emotional intensity helps. When you’re visualising a successful outcome of your manifested desire before the manifestation happens, it does take a lot of emotional conjuring to get you in the right feeling. When I was in the process of selling my house, I would visualise every night about what would happen as soon as I received my asking price for it. And that needed a lot of emotions, especially when my realtor kept reminding me how it would be tough to get my asking price because of the “bad economy”. More emotional intensity is required especially when we are unable to get the support we require from our current physical world.
So, just watch your emotions. The target emotion, is EASE. That’s the best state for manifestation. When there is a problem in your life, please deal with it. But if you can do so without being too emotionally intense about it, then you’ll reap the benefits.